Echo's

I don't know how to write poems. Nor do I really care, but the echo's in my head about my past, future, and present haunt me saying I'm gonna end up in a shithole. I love one girl and I don't know if it'll end well, but damn it... I can't help the pounding feeling I have in my chest every time I hear her name. I could indulge in her soft arms when she hugs me and kisses me into a world where there's no worries and the worst thing could happen is scrapping your knee. Oh.... How I hope this time it's different... Anxiety pushes me to the wall and holds me there. The men in my room at night don't seem to ever leave no matter how big the dose. Leaving my town for another hell is to much. I can't deal with another hospital. I've been to too many. Two faced people I wanna watch them fall to there demise, but then again who am I to talk. Going back to the self medicating drugs I would do all the time doesn't sound like a good way to co-op. I can't deal spending hours high on something just to later regret everything. Powder to the nose doesn't sound bad, but god... It's fucking hell.... I have to face with everything somehow while anxiety attacks me angerly. Hopefully she'll help me. I can say I'm happy now, but to an extent.

I hate this band

Everything was great in the beginning(Everything usually is). The day I forgot to play a song in front of 6 people that wouldn't care in the world if I sucked at guitar and you go and tell me I'm horrible and make me tremble in your presence. Making me shed tears and break down? Did seeing me cry bring you some twisted pleasure?
You fucked me over so bad once and I do one thing you deserve and I'm seen as the bad guy?! Knowing each other since we were born mean anything? You got me into everything I am today. Do you hate what you think you created? I can't ever be good at something. You have to be superior.... I could never tell you that I hate you in your face because you with your sick past of anger would send me to the emergency room. I'm a nice guy, but you've done to much.....